


Was

by BeckKingOfHell



Category: Voltron - Fandom, vld - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Gen, Sad Lance (Voltron), Shiro - Freeform, Voltron
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-04
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2019-03-13 10:59:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13569174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeckKingOfHell/pseuds/BeckKingOfHell
Summary: Got a writing prompt!Prompt: Lance starts messing up in training and Shiro starts noticing and is getting annoyed with him. He tells him to meet with him for extra training. Lance keeps getting frustrated because he's not doing well against Shiro and he keeps telling him that he needs to do better but he already knows that. Shiro tells him to shape up because "you're a hero now and people are going to look up to you, didn't you have hero?" and Lance breaks down saying that Shiro was his hero and Shiro feels guilty





	Was

“Lance, you need to start taking our training seriously!” Shiro growled.

“I’m trying-”

“-Well you need to try harder.” He gazed down at Lance with discontent. “You’ll jeopardize our missions if you don’t stop messing up so much.”

“Shiro-” He tried again.

“No, I’m not hearing another excuse. You’re going to meet me tonight for extra training lessons.” He turned, leaving Lance alone in the hallway.

He pulled at his hair, “Why don’t you understand that I  _ am _ trying my best. I’m not good with hand to hand combat, but I far excel you all with long distance fighting.” He sighed as an all too familiar ache began in his chest.

_ It’s not like I try to mess up. It just happens. It’s part of the learning process. _ He thought, sliding down against the wall.

Ever since they found Shiro he’s been more aggressive with everyone. Constantly yelling at them, belittling them. Sometimes reducing them to tears.

Lance softly whacked his head against the wall, doing all that he could to hold back his tears of disappointment. He knew he was letting his hero down and that there was nothing he could to do stop it. He wondered why he was about to cry, it’s not like it would fix anything. Shiro would still stay annoyed with him.

Lance picked himself off the ground, deciding that it would be better to feel crestfallen in his room instead of the hallways, where he could let down more of his teammates.

He slowly walked down the dimly lit halls, dark thoughts crossing his mind.  _ What if I do mess up and put everyone in danger? What if… what if I get someone hurt? Or worse? What if I get hurt and cause everyone to abandon their mission?  _ The feeling of failure weighed heavy on his shoulders. He knew he was a burden on the others, that he was just the seventh wheel. He wasn’t anything special, not like Pidge, who was computer smart. Or Hunk, who could make anything out of spare parts. Not even Keith, who was skilled with both sword and knife. Shiro was on a whole different level, along with Allura. Even Coran was special because of his knowledge. 

Lance had nothing. Sure, he could make light of any situation, but that didn’t do anything to help in the face of danger. Yeah, he had a great aim, but it didn’t mean shit if the opponent was up close. He was just homesick boy from Cuba.

He opened the door to his room and flopped on his bed. Everyone was a something from somewhere, going everywhere. He was a nobody from nothing, going nowhere. Tears pricked his eyes as he did his best to hold them at bay.

He gave a sad laugh.  _ His best _ . Like that was ever enough. He was never enough. Not for his parents who had high hopes for him, only to be crushed at the fact that he was just a cargo pilot. Not for his friends, who are constantly let down by his regular behavior. Not even for Shiro, a man that he looked up to.

Shiro was everything that Lance wanted to be. Strong, physically and emotionally. Shiro could handle anything, Galras, Haggar, even Coran’s cooking. The man was stable. Nothing could knock him down, even if the situation seemed hopeless. Focused, something that Lance wasn’t the best at. Nothing could faze Shiro in Lance’s eyes. Not mention that the leader was _patience_ _as hell_. 

Except when it came to Lance. He just had the natural ability to piss him off. It didn’t matter what he was doing. If he was doing good, it wasn’t  _ as good _ . If he was doing bad is was as if he stabbed a innocent man.  _ Nothing _ was good enough for Shiro from Lance. Not to mention that he never bothered to even  _ consider _ Lance’s opinions, muchless  _ listen _ to him.

Lance was just… hated. He certainly felt hated. No one listened to him, or batted an eye if he got hurt during training. Except Hunk.

Hunk was an amazing friend to Lance. He was probably the only one who cared about his life on the ship. But lately, Lance found himself listening to Shiro’s harsh words the past few months. Lance hadn’t bothered to talk to Hunk about his feelings for weeks now. Instead just bottling them up, because he was the reason they were all away from their families. It was his fault he was homesick for his family back at Cuba. If he had just left things alone, if he just listened to Hunk about going back to their dorms, they wouldn’t be fighting for their lives. They wouldn’t have to eat like it was the last time. They wouldn’t have to feel like tomorrow is never promised. 

Lance met Shiro at the training deck. They started with the training staffs, blocking, jabbing, whacking. Lance’s sides were covered in forming bruises when Shiro decided to switch to hand to hand combat.

“Come on, Lance. You need to do better than that.” Shiro said after he landed a swift kick to Lance’s legs.

Lance got up, instantly having to go on the defensive. Shiro was quick and soon Lance was sprawled out on the floor.

Shiro began to get irritated with the boy. “Lance, get up. You need to actually try.”

“I  _ am _ trying.” Lance whispered as he stood up.  _ Not that it matters to you. I don’t matter to you. If I did, perhaps you would see that this  _ is  _ my best. _

A minute later Lance was back on the floor, groaning. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes as frustration filled his chest. He was doing his best. He was trying his hardest. Why wasn’t it enough? Why couldn’t  _ he _ be enough? Just for once, just this once… he’d like to be enough for his hero. But he wasn’t. And he never will, because  _ nothing, absolutely nothing,  _ is good enough. Not for his family. Not for his teammates. Not even for his hero.

He just wanted to prove that he was valuable too. That he was good at some things too. He just wanted to feel part of the team for once. Just this once.

“You do understand that you are a hero now, and people are going to look up to you, right? Don’t you have a hero, Lance?”

It felt like a hand was gripping Lance’s heart, squeezing it. His tears spilled down his eyes as he looked up to Shiro from the floor. “I used to.”

Shiro just looked at him with puzzlement. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, that I used to have a hero. I used to look up to someone until I realized that he was just as ass.” Lance clenched his fists, and gritted his teeth as he felt his world falling apart. “He was everything I wanted to be. He was strong, stable, focused, and patience. But not with me. Never with me.” He whispered, tears streaming down his face like rivers. “He’s been through a lot. He fought Garlas before I even knew who or what they were.”

Shiro’s eyes widen. 

“He was everything I wanted to be and more.” Lance slowly stood up and faced Shiro’s sorrowful face. “ _ Was _ .”

And with a broken heart, Lance left Shiro staring guiltily at the wall, feeling dead inside. 

**Author's Note:**

> My first Voltron fan fic! I hope I did well, considering that I don't do well writing in third person. Feel free to give me a prompt! I'd love to write for you guys!


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